36 terms · A–Z
The glossary.
Plain-English definitions of the words used inside the catalogue, the guides and the scene generally. Materials, practices, safety language and roles — honestly defined for British grown-ups.
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- 316L surgical stainless steel
- The same alloy used for orthopaedic implants — non-porous, indestructible, holds temperature. Heavy, which is the appeal in steel toys.
A.
- Aftercare
- The deliberate care taken between partners after a BDSM scene — water, blanket, conversation, time. Not optional; a structural part of the practice rather than a courtesy.
B.
- BDSM
- Umbrella initialism for Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism. Describes a vocabulary of consensual practices, not a checklist; almost no practitioner does all of it.
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Ben Wa balls
aka Pelvic floor trainers
- Weighted spheres held inside the vagina that strengthen the pelvic floor through resistance. Modern smart trainers add app-based feedback; traditional balls are smaller and uncoated.
- Body-safe
- An unregulated marketing term that should mean: non-porous, free of phthalates and BPA, and made of one of four genuinely safe materials (silicone, glass, surgical steel, ABS plastic).
- Borosilicate glass
- Heat-tempered glass (Pyrex-equivalent) used in sex toys. Non-porous, dishwasher-safe, compatible with every lubricant, takes temperature beautifully. Drop-resistant but not unbreakable.
- Bullet vibrator
- A small cylindrical vibrator, usually 50–80 mm long, designed for clitoral or focused external use. The most common starter sex toy in the UK.
C.
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Clitoral suction toy
aka Pleasure-air, Womanizer
- A vibrator that uses pulses of air rather than direct contact to stimulate the clitoris. Pioneered by Womanizer; LELO's Sona and several others now compete in the segment.
D.
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Dom
aka Dominant
- The directing / leading partner in a power-exchange dynamic. Responsible for negotiating clearly, staying within agreed limits, and providing aftercare.
E.
- Edge play
- BDSM practices considered higher-risk than typical scenes — breath play, knife play, electroplay, and fire play are common examples. Requires explicit negotiation, experience and trust.
F.
- Fleshlight
- A brand-name male masturbator presented in a torch-style outer case, with a soft TPE-blend internal sleeve. The category leader for premium male strokers; multiple textures and signature collaborations.
- Flogger
- An impact implement with multiple soft tails (leather, suede, deerskin, sometimes rubber) attached to a single handle. Produces a distributed, rhythmic sensation often described as "controlled rain".
J.
- Jelly rubber
- A category of soft, often phthalate-plasticised PVC sex toys. Strongly outgases when new; should not be used internally. Older and cheaper toys are more likely to be jelly.
K.
- Kegel exercises
- Pelvic-floor muscle contractions performed in sets, usually with weighted Kegel balls for resistance. NHS-recommended for postnatal recovery, urinary incontinence, and improved sexual function.
- Kinbaku
- Japanese-influenced rope bondage with explicitly sexual or psychological intent — closely related to shibari but with a more direct erotic charge.
L.
- Latex
- Natural rubber, body-safe in itself but a common allergen (1–6% of UK adults). Used for clothing, condoms and some bondage tape. Outgases a slightly bitter smell that fades.
N.
- Negotiation
- The conversation between partners before a scene — what will and will not happen, hard limits, soft limits, safe word, aftercare. The single best predictor of whether a scene goes well.
P.
- Paddle
- A flat broad impact implement, usually leather. Delivers a deep "thud" sensation that lingers; the most forgiving impact tool for beginners after the hand.
- Pegging
- The practice of a person — typically a woman — wearing a strap-on dildo to anally penetrate a male partner. Stimulates the prostate; orientation-neutral act between heterosexual partners.
- Phthalates
- Plasticisers used to soften PVC. Restricted to ≤0.1% in children's items under EU REACH but unregulated in adult novelties; should be avoided in any toy used internally.
- Platinum-cure silicone
- A non-porous, sterilisable, hypoallergenic silicone — the gold-standard sex-toy material. Compatible with water-based lubricant; bonds with silicone-based lube.
- Prostate
- A walnut-sized gland located 5–7 cm inside the rectum on the front (abdominal-side) wall in male anatomy. Densely innervated; the source of the deep, distinct sensation associated with receptive anal play.
R.
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RACK
aka Risk-Aware Consensual Kink
- The modern ethical framework for BDSM: practices carry risk, both parties understand it, both consent. Acknowledges that no activity is risk-free; informed consent matters more than absolute safety.
- Riding crop
- An impact implement borrowed from equestrian use — long shaft, small leather popper at the tip. Delivers concentrated "sting" rather than distributed thud; precise enough for targeted teasing.
S.
- Safe word
- A pre-agreed word — typically "red" for stop and "amber" for slow down — that overrides any role play and signals an immediate halt. Within a scene, "no" may be playful; the safe word is always literal.
- Shibari
- Japanese-influenced rope bondage focused on aesthetic patterns and slow tying — as much craft as kink. Often distinguished from kinbaku, its more sexual cousin.
- Spanking
- Impact play delivered by hand to the buttocks. The most common entry-point to BDSM impact; sets the foundation of consent, pacing and aftercare without requiring any equipment.
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SSC
aka Safe, Sane, Consensual
- The traditional ethical framework for BDSM: practices should be safe, sane, and consensual. Largely superseded in newer scene writing by RACK (Risk-Aware Consensual Kink) but still widely cited.
- Strap-on
- A wearable harness that holds a dildo, allowing the wearer to penetrate a partner. Used in pegging, queer sex, and any context where the wearer is the inserting partner.
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Sub
aka Submissive
- The receiving / yielding partner in a power-exchange dynamic. The sub agrees in advance to follow the dom's direction within negotiated limits and retains the right to halt at any time via safe word.
- Sub-drop
- The emotional or physical low experienced by a submissive partner in the hours or days after a scene, caused by the body returning from elevated endorphin and adrenaline states. Aftercare and follow-up reduce its severity.
- Switch
- A practitioner who plays both dom and sub roles, either in different relationships or by switching during a single scene.
T.
- Tenga Egg
- A single-use Japanese masturbation sleeve presented inside a hard plastic egg-shaped case. Around £10 each; seven core textures including Tornado, Spider, Crater and Wavy.
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TPE
aka TPR, Thermoplastic Elastomer
- A category of soft synthetic elastomers used in cheaper sex toys. Microscopically porous, can absorb body fluids, cannot be sterilised; phthalate-free is the minimum requirement to consider buying.
W.
- Wand vibrator
- A long-handle vibrator with a large rounded head — originally marketed as a body massager. Produces deeper, broader vibration than smaller toys; popular with women, often used externally.
- Whip
- An impact implement with a single long tail. The most theatrical and the hardest to use safely; requires practice on inanimate targets before partner work.